Helping your Child Build Connections
As a toddler, your child’s world is expanding, and you may suddenly find yourself running with them to playdates, preschool, and other activities. Helping your child make connections with others is critical for building resilience.
Quality over quantity!
It may sometimes feel like you’re always on the go. Take advantage of small moments throughout the day to show your child how much they mean to you. This will help them feel comfortable taking risks and facing obstacles because they know that you’ll be there for them no matter what!
- It doesn’t have to be a long time to be special! Just 5 to 10 minutes together talking about your day or doing fun activities (story time, arts and crafts, or drawing) can send valuable messages to your child about how important they are to you.
- Spend time together in the “no technology” zone. Always being on the lookout for emails, messages, or updates can mean that you’re missing out on important moments – and your child will notice. Put your phone on silent and give your little one your full attention.
- Moments that we may take for granted can mean a whole lot to our children. Having special bedtime routines, rubbing their back, and holding their hand are just a few little ways to show your child that you value and love them.
Encourage connections with other people
Your child interacts with many people, especially if they are in preschool or other organized social activities. Other people in your child’s life are important sources of support.
These individuals may be their preschool teachers, family friends, swim instructors, or the librarian at storytime.
- Having these bonds can help your little one learn important life skills, such as how to be responsible, take turns, follow rules, and be fair.
- When your child has strong, supportive individuals in their life, they may be more likely to test their abilities and face challenges – knowing that these adults will be there to encourage and help them.
Now that your little one is starting preschool or getting involved in more activities, they’re interacting with more and more children. So grab some phone numbers or email addresses from other parents and consider setting up playdates.
Spending time with other kids helps to reinforce important skills like collaborating, listening, and problem-solving.
How temperament plays a role
Now that your child is having more interactions with others, you may notice that they approach things differently than those around them, which is not a “bad” thing. Every child is unique and has their own temperament. To help your child build connections and resilience, pay attention to what temperament style they have. When you are supporting them in how they interact and respond to the world, they’ll feel supported no matter what obstacles come their way.
- Remember that your child’s temperament is not something your child can choose. Sometimes, how they respond to new situations, change, or emotional experiences will not be how you want them to respond.
- Be patient. Don’t get frustrated with your little one when their actions or responses seem like an “overreaction” or inappropriate. This is tricky – remember to take a deep breath and talk to them calmly.
Don’t avoid situations that they are less comfortable in, but make sure to give them opportunities to do activities they enjoy in settings where they are comfortable.
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- Take their perspective! Although we have our own views on how to respond in situations, think about how your shy child may feel when you are introducing them to lots of new people at once.
- Provide support to your child especially in times where they are having difficulty handling what is going on around them.
- Make smooth transitions between activities. If your little one becomes anxious when you leave them with family, a babysitter, or at day care. Don’t just drop them off and leave quickly. Take some time to help them feel comfortable and have clear goodbyes, so they do not feel tricked.
- Let them do activities that they enjoy. If they love to play in large groups of kids or if they would rather play alone or with one or two other peers, let them!