Promote Independence!
When your child encounters a problem, stepping in can seem like the “right” thing to do. But when you intervene, your child misses opportunities to build important skills and self-confidence. Provide assistance when it is needed, but encourage them to solve problems their own way.
Encourage your children to think about what they can do to fix problems before stepping in.
Provide lots of positive support and guide them to possible solutions. The sense of independence they will gain from trying things on their own is well worth the effort!
- If your child is having trouble with a puzzle, ask, “What can we do so that the pieces fit?”
- Allow your child to fail. Yes, this may be a little uncomfortable at first, but allowing them to experience the natural consequences of their decisions is extremely important. You should never risk their safety or ignore your child when they are in need, but be their sidekick rather than their hero.
- Help your child develop a growth mindset by encouraging them to believe they have the ability to solve the problems that they encounter! Use encouraging phrases such as “keep trying” or “you’ve got this” to let them know that you believe in them.
When problems arise, and kids don’t know what to do, it is common for them to feel some powerful feelings.
Help them manage “big” and complicated emotions by acknowledging their feelings and giving those feelings names (sad, worried, tired, frustrated). When your children understand why they’re having big feelings, they’re better able to evaluate the problem, and consider solutions.
For more tips and tools to help your child understand and manage emotions, click here.