Teaching Children Aged 6-8 About:

Self-Perceived Competence

Click through the different topics below to learn the different ways you can help your 6-8 year old develop a sense of competence!

Competence

Your child is starting to discover things that they are great at – whether it’s singing, drawing, sharing, or cracking jokes. They are also facing new experiences that are difficult. Let them work through challenging tasks, giving them a chance to solve problems without too much help. Fixing problems on their own helps them to see that they are able make things better own their own.

It’s their time to shine!

Let your child have opportunities to explore new activities and find things that they enjoy and are good at (even if they mess up along the way)! 

Free for all! Allow your child some time for free play so they can develop their own interests. Your child will strengthen their creative and imaginative “muscles” when they are in charge of their time.

  • Watch your child play. Pay attention to the things that they really enjoy, are uninterested in, or find difficult. 
  • Free time gives your child the chance to work in groups, share toys, make up rules for games, and speak up for themselves if they think something is unfair.

Children want to help, so give your child the chance to help you and others throughout the day. Showing your child that their behavior can have a positive effect on others can make them feel more confident. Find ways to show them that you believe they can get things done and are happy with the help they provided.

Mission accomplished! Help your child to become responsible by creating opportunities for them to complete mini assignments. Having your child do small jobs gives them a sense of importance and accomplishment. Let them…

  • Check items off the grocery list.
  • Help a sibling zipper their coat.
  • Fold napkins for the dinner table. 

Think ahead! Encourage your child to prepare for future events so that they know how to plan ahead. 

  • Let them help you plan an upcoming activity by giving them choices and responsibilities.
  • Have them think about what can happen in situations that they haven’t faced before and discuss what they might do. For example, what could happen if they go to a birthday party for a new classmate, or you are late when picking them up from school?

When your child isn’t sure if they can handle a small task, remind them of other times they used similar skills. 

–  For example, when your child is learning how to jump rope, remind them of how good they are at hopscotch. Point out that they already know timing and rhythm from dancing. 

–  Tell your child that most activities and experiences are never brand new. Lots of the things they already know can be used in other situations too!

Finding their voice!

REMEMBER…

Crying or “shutting down” are forms of communication, but talking is way more effective. Even as grown-ups, we sometimes forget to talk when we are feeling upset.

While knowing how to fix problems is important, your child should also be able to think and talk about the parts that are difficult for them. 

  • Be their guide when they’re lost! If your child is feeling overwhelmed, remind them how to calm their body down and point out different ways they might solve the problem.
  • Teach them that it’s okay to need help! Sometimes your child will not be able to handle a tricky situation. Let them know that they can and should ask for help when they need it. Competence is not only knowing what you can do, but also knowing when you need help.
  • Encourage your child to discuss when they need something, whether it’s help on their homework, a few minutes of alone time, or a shoulder to lean on. Older children (and even adults!) need reminders to talk through difficult experiences too.

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