Responding to Not-So-Great Behaviors
Their behaviors have an impact.
As your baby becomes a daring and delightful toddler, they start to learn that their actions affect others. Blowing kisses and waving hello can lead to big smiles, while biting and hitting lead to frowns and tears.
- As your toddler gets a little older, talk to them to help them understand how their behavior affects others. For example, explain that pulling the cat’s tail or biting their sibling hurts! Talk about ways to treat others nicely.
- Your role is to teach your child to avoid conflict by understanding which behaviors are appropriate and safe, and which are not.
Establish basic safety rules and routines in your house.
Telling your little one to “take a break for a few minutes if you’re feeling angry,” or “find a grown-up to talk to when your upset,” teaches them to be safe and how to get along with others.
- Crying, biting, and hitting are all ways that children respond to anger. But shouting and lashing out increases conflict rather than lessening it.
- When you tell your child that it is not ok to hit, pinch, or throw things at others, provide them with alternative, helpful strategies for managing their frustration and avoiding conflict.
- Offer your toddler some tips on what they could do to get what they want without using unwanted behaviors.
- Physical consequences are never an appropriate punishment.
- Encourage them to use their words (“share, please?”) or go to an adult for food if they are hungry.
- Talk out loud about more “advanced” safety rules; saying “look both ways before we cross the street” and “let’s make sure we have our seatbelts on!”