Understanding the Feelings of Others
Identifying and understanding emotions is about more than just being aware of your own emotions – it’s also about being able to recognize, and be sensitive to, the feelings of others. When children understand the emotions of their family, friends, and peers, they have stronger relationships and are more likely to recognize their own emotions too!
Learning how to recognize how others are feeling is hard, but it can be done!
Lay the foundation for your child to be sensitive to the experiences of family, friends, and peers by having open conversations with them.
Tip: Play “Emotions Charades” with your child for a fun way to practice this skill. Write different feelings on pieces of paper, and take turns acting out and guessing the feeling. This is a great activity for the whole family!
- Talk with your child about different “clues” that they can use to figure out how someone is feeling. Some great clues include:
- Tone and volume of their voice
- Facial expressions
- Body language
- What they are saying
- Sometimes, it can be difficult for kids to understand how others might be feeling in a particular situation. When this happens, encourage your child to think of how they might feel in that situation in order to help them develop empathy and understanding for others.
- If your child noticed another student sitting alone at lunch and mentions it to you on the drive home from school, you might say, “I don’t know how Sarah felt about sitting alone at lunch – and I bet you might not know either! How would you feel if you were sitting alone?”
Different strokes for different folks!
Being aware of others’ feelings takes work, but as a parent or caregiver, you have the incredible opportunity to be an example for your child – both by sharing your own feelings and by how you respond to others!
- You aren’t a mind reader, and neither is your child. Have conversations with them about the fact that different people may experience very different feelings in the same situation.
-
- For example, although your child might love getting up on stage to sing in the school talent show, another child might be terrified to get on stage because they become nervous in front of large groups of people.
- Make “feelings talk” a regular part of your relationship with your child. Tell your child how you are feeling, and make observations about others’ feelings too.
- For example, say, “I notice you’re brother is frowning, his fists are clenched, and he was yelling. It seems like he might be angry. Maybe we should give him some time to calm down.”
Read books, watch movies, and sing songs with your kids. These kinds of shared activities gives you an opportunity to:
- Ask your child how characters might be feeling.
- Better determine how well your child may (or may not) understand complex emotions.
- Give your kid the chance to explain how they read other people’s emotions by using verbal or nonverbal clues like facial expression, body language, and eye contact.